Show Me The Money

I played in the normal Saturday morning roll up yesterday with the usual suspects at my club. The weather was glorious and I was unusually buoyed by my performance on Monday where I managed to shoot a personal best score. The roll up is good old, fashioned social golf. Granted we all put £2 in the kitty and there is usually a first and second prize, but it's all about the fun. The humour at times can be tougher than the golf but they are all great guys and I always look forward to playing.

I started off poorly for once, given recent form. I skied my drive to leave myself well short of the green, pitched on and then three putted for a single point. Not what I had been looking for. I needn't have worried unduly as I then went on to par the next three holes before making a sumptuous birdie at the 503 yard 5th. Fairway in regulation. Check. Second shot to position A+. Check. Decent lie. Negative. Having hit a great lay up to the perfect wedge distance the damn ball was lying in an old divot. I hit down on it and although it came out low it was the perfect distance. One bounce, a lot of check spin and there it was lying next to the hole like an old ginger Tom in front of the fire. It left a simple five foot putt which went in dead centre.

Now we've spoken about my ability to conjure up problems from nowhere before. As your guide through Homer's Odyssey, warts and all, I'm pleased to announce I found a new way to not score any points on a hole. I pulled this new trick off playing the par 3 6th, my nemesis as my recent blog will testify (http://threeoffthetee.blogspot.com/2011/05/hackers-guide-to-royal-ascot-hole-6.html)

I hit a decent 4 iron that just caught the right hand bunker. No problem, just get it out, two putt, take a bogey and one point and move on. Not today. I'm not sure how I managed it but I hit the ball twice. Once on impact and then as I followed through, propelling it off the front edge of the green. Naturally there is a penalty and no reward for trick shots like this and even though I rolled in a great eight footer it made no difference. I played the 7th like a fool and dropped another point but got it straight back by hitting the green on the short par 3 8th hole and knocking in a twelve footer left to right downhiller for a rather cheeky birdie. I smashed a drive down the 9th and almost hit it too well into the ditch that crosses the fairway at the 290 yard mark. Granted it was downwind and downhill but a timely reminder that the hazard can come into play at this time of year. Out in 20 points and only scoring on eight holes. Happy Days.

My mood was enhanced even further when my 9 iron to the 10th was spot on and left just three feet to negotiate for another birdie. I missed the green left at the next into a bunker but came out pretty well (for me) and rattled another single putt in to save par. My luck ran out a tad on the next though. I thought I'd hit a perfect drive cutting off a fair chunk of the dogleg and clearing the trees that block progress. However when we go there, I had not only failed to do so but the ball was nestled unplayable at the base of one of them. Chalk up a six for a lonely one point. Damn!

I needn't have worried. My putter was on fire and having missed the green left at the difficult 186 yard par 3 (somehow recognised as the second easiest hole on the course) and having only hit a mediocre recovery I rammed a huge curling putt from all of fifteen feet for another par save. As they always say, no pictures only numbers on the card. Mind you that will return to haunt me.

I made a pigs ear of the 14th, thinning a simple pitch shot through the green and having to rely on another single putt to salvage a point. My driving has always been a bete noire but for the most part had behaved impeccably. I launched one down the 15th into the perfect position and as it was downwind decided to go for glory and hit the green on this par 5. In truth I hit it too well and the shot ran through the back into bandit country and I was lucky to find it and to have a shot. I managed to chop it out to the edge of the green and two putt.

I missed the green right at the 16th after another good drive but this time the short game rode to the rescue and a deft chip left a simple tap in for another par. Two rounds, back to back, going to plan. As hard to believe for you reading this as it was for me playing the shots I'm sure. Of course it was inevitable that the driving wouldn't last. Coming to the 18th, it is another hole that has a ditch crossing the fairway at about the 270 yard mark, but it is always fast running, playing downwind and so often in range even for relatively short hitters like me. I elected to hit 3 wood to stay short and as if to top and tail the round hit it as badly as I had on the first. It went short and right and left me with not option but to play out sideways. I recovered well enough to make a six (nett par) and had completed a second nine worth 20 points for a grand total of 40.

Now the one thing that makes our roll up or "greedie" as it's known so interesting, is there is always one guy every week that plays well below their handicap and scoops the money so there was no counting of chickens until everyone had returned.

In the end I had taken the cash. Granted it was only £12 but a win is a win. It did however mean my new "Greedie" handicap has been cut by two shots for winning (for four weeks) back to 11. At least it'll give me a chance to remember what it was like when my official handicap was that low too.

The one thing I've found from these last two rounds is that the more relaxed I am, the better the banter is, the more I tend to play on auto-pilot and not worry about too many technical issues. I will grant you my short game is never more than a thinned chip away from collapsing and so is always on a knife edge but that aside, the guys I play with make it so easy to just stand there, assess the shot and swing. Of course seasoned golfers, teaching pros and even rank beginners will all be screaming at the screen that you're supposed to do it that way all the time. Do you know something? You'd be right but I've always had a habit of being a thinker and it is only through the encouragement of some good golfing friends and some plain talking from the Golf Monthly Forum that in the last eighteen months I've tried to play a more natural, hit it, find it and hit it again type of game. Sometimes it works and sometimes it works in the beginning until I have a bad few holes when the voices in my head return. One thing is certain. You cannot produce good, or more importantly consistent golf with a thousand swing thoughts occupying your mind.

So what do these last two rounds tell me (and you)? Well the swing is finally working pretty well and for once the unforced errors were outweighed by a stellar putting performance (only 29 putts) and that when the mistakes came they weren't card wreckers. It says very clearly that when I'm on, I'm still pretty damn good but that clearly I'm not "ON" enough. So what do we do to change that. Big question and one that I think may need a radical approach. Plans are afoot bloggers. I'm going to a mysterious place to see if I can exorcise these voices. Things are going to get deep.